Some Like It Hopeless (A Temporary Engagement) Read online

  When Shane was pretty sure his stomach wasn’t going to empty itself, he said, “I’m a glutton for punishment. You should be glad or we would never have lasted as long as we have.”

  Christian pushed a glass of cool water into Shane’s hand and laid a wet washcloth on his forehead.

  “I am glad. But I’m still going to try and get you to like orange juice.”

  “The older I get, the more likely it becomes.” Right at this moment, he was swearing to himself he’d never drink again.

  Christian popped pills into Shane’s hand. “Brady sent these up. Said you’d need them this morning.”

  He’d need a few good more than just two, but it was a start. Might take the edge off enough.

  “The man is a god among men. Did he call you and tell you I was here?”

  “Cassandra did.”

  Shane braved the light to crack open one eye. “She did? Are you sure?”

  “Pretty sure. She called me a few choice words and said you thought I was going to break up with you.”

  “She told me you weren’t.”

  Christian shook his head and Shane sighed, resting his head against the pillow and closing his eyes again. When Christian sat down beside him and slipped his hand into Shane’s, he thought he’d die a happy man right there. Because he was still pretty sure he’d liked to. Two pills were not enough.

  “Did she. . .tell you anything else? About what we talked about?”

  “No. She said. . . I don’t remember exactly what she said but that I’d like it. I’ll wait. I like surprises.”

  Christian didn’t say anything, just sat next to him holding his hand. Not ready obviously for whatever surprise he was contemplating.

  It was okay. Shane really did like surprises. He didn’t mind waiting, not when he knew he was going to like it.

  Christian said, “Cassandra likes me more when she’s nearly comatose. She smiled at me.”

  Shane shared his own little smile at the proof that one day the two people he loved would love each other. Then stopped, because moving his face hurt his head. Shane thought he’d feel better if he tried waking up again, could feel the black of sleep hovering.

  “Shane, please don’t wear gray again. You don’t need to, and it is not your color.”

  He struggled against sleep enough to murmur, “How do you know it’s not my color?”

  “I know.”

  And then he fell asleep, Christian’s hand tucked nicely into his own. The image of Cassandra smiling drunkenly at his pretty little bird lulling him off to dreamland.

  All was right with the world.

  Or would be. The next time he woke up.

  Mackenzie and Ethan came to town.

  Cassandra talked them into staying at Brady’s hotel even though it was a farther drive to the office.

  And when Rodrigo called up to tell her they were here, like she’d bribed him to, she ran downstairs to see the boys.

  And Mackenzie and Ethan.

  She stopped when she saw Mackenzie, one eye trained on Wyatt and the other pushing Grant in his stroller.

  Pregnant Mackenzie. In the no-one-would-think-it’s-a-little-weight-gain, she-is-obviously-pregnant phase.

  Again.

  Cassandra said, “Again?”

  Mackenzie turned, rolling her eyes. “Tell me about it.”

  Wyatt saw his favorite mark and ran up singing, “Auntie Cass! Auntie Cass!”

  She braced herself for the assault, grinning as he tried to knock her over with his enthusiasm.

  Grant squealed in his stroller. Not really sure who Cassandra was yet, he was too little to remember her, but just like his brother, saw someone he would like to smile at.

  Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Brady come out from his office, heading for them.

  Tall, dark, dangerous. Big.

  Mackenzie’s eyes widened and Cassandra smirked. “Tell me about it.”

  Best friends. Didn’t need to say a word.

  Brady shook hands with Mackenzie.

  And didn’t look at Wyatt clamped to Cassandra’s leg.

  Ethan came over after registering, shaking Brady’s hand and then taking Cassandra’s hand and holding it in his.

  “Hello, Cassandra. Lovely as ever.”

  His voice washed down her spine like warm water. So relaxing, so calming. Leaving her only with the thought that, why yes, he was lovely. His green eyes twinkled and she blinked up at him, tinkling a laugh.

  Brady watched her, his eyebrows knitted together. “What’s going on?”

  Mackenzie’s peeled her son off Cassandra’s leg and her husband off Cassandra’s hand. “She’s lost the rest of her brain cells.”

  “Oh. This is her Ethan O’Connor face.”

  Mackenzie laughed. “Yes.”

  He looked at the slightly dazed look in Cassandra’s eyes, at the matter-of-fact look in Mackenzie’s. “It doesn’t bother you?”

  “Since there is only one woman on this planet who doesn’t look at him like that. . .I’ve gotten used to it.”

  Cassandra shook her head, clearing it. She looked at Mackenzie’s growing belly and said, “Pretty sure even that one woman looks at him like that occasionally.”

  Ethan rubbed Mackenzie’s belly lovingly. “It’s my proof to the world. Even this one looks at me like that occasionally.”

  Brady found something else to look at. Ethan noticed his discomfort and asked for a tour of the hotel facilities, and when they trotted off, the women headed for the elevator.

  The women, the boys, and the three nannies.

  Cassandra could on occasion hold her tongue, so she didn’t comment on it. In front of the nannies.

  Mackenzie watched the floor number tick higher. “Will I be meeting Christian as well?”

  Cassandra tried not to make a face. “Tonight at dinner.”

  “And?”

  “You’ll hate him. Because you’re my best friend.”

  “I never understood how you could have so many best friends. Shane, me, the guy who changes the oil in your car.”

  Cassandra grinned. “Shane’s not really my best friend, I just don’t know what else to call him. Other half? Part of my soul?”

  “And Brady? What do you call him?”

  “A nice distraction.”

  “A big distraction.”

  The elevator door dinged and opened, and Wyatt went racing down the hall. Cassandra murmured, “Tell me about it.”

  They shared a little look that said there would be d-e-t-a-i-l-s, and Cassandra was oddly reluctant. She didn’t want to share Brady and their top of the car adventure. . .

  Yeah, okay. She’d share that. That had been pretty good.

  Mackenzie headed right for the couch, groaning as she sat. “I hate being pregnant. I hurt constantly.”

  “Is it because you’re getting old?”

  “Shut up.”

  Cassandra went to sit next to her, patting her friend’s knee and watching Wyatt run in and out of each room, Grant toddling after him.

  “It’s worth it, though, right?”

  Mackenzie massaged a sore spot, nodding. “I want a girl. You know?”

  Cassandra started to say, “Maybe this one,” then trailed off when Mackenzie shook her head.

  “Another boy? Well, give it eighteen to twenty years. The world will thank you.”

  “That’s what I’m afraid of. Not even my best friend can keep her head screwed on when my husband smiles at her. What am I going to do with three more of them running around?”

  “What did Ethan’s mom do to keep him contained?”

  “She tried to get him married off as quickly as possible. Which, now that I think about it, is not such a bad idea.” She nodded, thinking it through, then stopped and sighed. “Of course, that didn’t work out real well. Maybe I’ll just take lots of cruises.”

  “I’ll come with. For moral support.”

  “Okay. If you stop ogling my husband in his swim suit.”

 
Cassandra sniffed. “I’ve gotten over pretty boys. I like mine a little scary now.”

  Mackenzie said, “Oh, good. You were embarrassing him with all that adoration. Downstairs. Ten minutes ago.”

  Cassandra laughed. “I wasn’t. Embarrassing him or adoring him.”

  “What would you call what you were doing?”

  “Floating. . . In the river of his eyes.”

  Ethan and his eyes came into the suite, zeroing in on Mackenzie rubbing her belly.

  “You need to lie down, take a nap.”

  “The boys need to take a nap. I, a grown woman, just need to sit for a little while.”

  “The nannies will round up the boys and put them down. You, a grown woman growing the third of my six children, need a nap.”

  Cassandra said, “Your three nannies.”

  “Some days it’s not enough.” Mackenzie held up her hand, ticking up her fingers. “One for Wyatt. One for Grant. One to tag in when those little green eyes are too much to take and everyone starts thinking it is a good idea to fill the bathtub with ice cream.”

  Cassandra grinned, watching the three younger women running around chasing the boys. The young, pretty women.

  “You’re not worried a little bit?”

  Mackenzie laughed. “Nope.”

  Ethan said, “The trust. It’s terrifying.”

  “The trust. And what I’d do to you.”

  He shivered. “It’s seared into my brain. Even when we have a softball team’s worth of nannies, she won’t need to worry.”

  Mackenzie flicked her eyes to Cassandra, telling her without words that. . .Cassandra just had no clue. Maybe sometimes even best friends did need words.

  Mackenzie said, “We won’t ever need that many nannies. Six is never going to happen. Your mother likes me already.”

  “She’s just being polite. We’re going to have to go the distance.” He wiggled six fingers at her, and just to make sure she knew how he felt, said, “Six.”

  “You’re going to have to get a different wife if you’re set on a fourth, fifth, or sixth.”

  Cassandra chimed in. “You’re going to have to do a fourth at least. For a girl. You just said. . . Oh.”

  Mackenzie closed her eyes. “You’re losing your touch.”

  Ethan twinkled at his wife. “You do want a girl.”

  “I wasn’t going to just tell you. You like making me change my mind.”

  He smiled, this time at his wife. Long and slow. Everyone else forgotten. The most important person in his world.

  Mackenzie opened her eyes to that look and floated in that green river.

  Cassandra decided that was her cue. She pushed herself off the couch, heading for the door and saying over her shoulder, “I’ve missed you, Ethan.”

  “Hey!”

  “And you, Mackenzie. I just didn’t think I needed to say it.”

  Mackenzie grumbled, “We’re out of practice.”

  “It’ll come back to us. It’s like riding a bicycle, right?”

  Brady was sitting in his chair when Cassandra got to the penthouse. His eyes closed, his face empty.

  She wondered if the weekly meeting with his family had been bad. Or maybe he hadn’t liked seeing her Ethan O’Connor face in action.

  She put her hand on his shoulder and he opened his eyes, and the pain in them made her realize it wasn’t about her. Wasn’t about his family.

  It had been about the children he’d studiously avoided. About four year-old Wyatt wrapped around her leg; Grant kicking away in his stroller. Pregnant Mackenzie.

  Cassandra sat in Brady’s lap. Just sat there quietly with him so he wouldn’t be alone.

  He shifted, moving her into a more comfortable position. “I don’t know why it surprised me. I knew they were bringing their children.”

  “I’ll ask Mackenzie if the kids are eating with us tonight.”

  Brady shook his head. “I’ll just. . .”

  “Drink?”

  He snorted, then let out a long breath. “No. I’ll just deal with it.”

  She wiggled against him. “Would a lie-down-on-the-bed nap help?”

  “No, but a drive would.”

  Cassandra cocked her head. “Was that a euphemism?”

  He stood, holding her in his arms and walking her toward the bed. “Pretty sure it was.”

  The kids did not come down to dinner, and Cassandra breathed out a sigh of relief for Brady. It would be easier on him, even if she would miss them.

  Shane was vocal with his disappointment though, and he ran upstairs to kiss and hug them hello before sitting down to dinner.

  He showed the table four red hand prints on his pants when he came back down and said, “Spaghetti. Now I know why they’re eating up there.”

  Mackenzie hid her laughter unsuccessfully behind her hand and Ethan shook his head. “I should have warned you.”

  Cassandra put her hand under the table, on Brady’s thigh, just resting it there. He smiled at her, patting her hand. Telling her he was okay.

  He laughed at Shane’s Ethan O’Connor face. At the tilting of Shane’s head and the unfocusing of his eyes as Ethan talked and joked with him.

  Brady whispered, “Glad it’s not just you.”

  Cassandra leaned toward him. “It’s everyone. Look at Christian.”

  Christian was trying not to stare, trying not to smile stupidly. He kept glancing down at his plate, away from those green eyes, pulling his lips into a semi-frown.

  Cassandra almost liked him for trying. Made her remember when Mackenzie was trying to tell herself she wouldn’t fall for a golden boy.

  Brady laughed again. “It’s not everyone.”

  Cassandra looked around the table. Mackenzie, Christian, Shane, Cassandra. Everyone was under Ethan’s spell.

  “Oh, you mean you. I never thought you’d fall for it actually. Because you used to be him. You know all the tricks.”

  Brady raised his eyebrows at her. “You think I used to be like that? Charming?”

  Cassandra nodded. “Yeah. I’ve seen the pictures. You were a golden boy and I have no doubt you could wrap anyone around your finger.”

  And looking between Ethan and Brady, she could see that what he’d been through had been hell. It showed in every pore, and it hurt her. It hurt her to see how all-encompassing tragedy could change a man.

  How he would have been happy, and now there was darkness.

  Brady said, “I don’t think I was ever like him. He seems to genuinely care.”

  Ethan did genuinely care. It was his secret weapon. And Cassandra thought, it was what Brady had lost. She was sure he knew how to be charming; he hadn’t forgotten the skills.

  He just didn’t care anymore. About himself, about anyone else.

  Except he kind of did.

  She couldn’t count how many times he’d stepped between her and Christian. He wouldn’t let her attack someone who wouldn’t know how to defend himself.

  He was protecting Christian, yes. But he was protecting her, too.

  And when Brady was sleeping next to her, nearly dead with exhaustion, with six years of sleep to catch up on, she could see what he would have looked like. Before.

  And then he would wake, and open his eyes to find her in bed beside him and not his wife, and every morning he would remember and die again. And then he would look out the window, at the morning sun shining off the hills and feel the bed with his palms. And sigh. And smile at her.

  He was brutal, yes. With his honesty, with his words. With his body.

  That’s why she liked him. He was Truth. Everything else had been stripped from him, leaving only the raw truth behind.

  It was what she loved–

  Cassandra sucked in the last word, choking on it.

  She met Mackenzie’s eyes across the table, and apparently best friend was working again, because she didn’t need to say what she’d been thinking.

  Love?

  They had something, but it wasn’t love. Not for
her, not for him.

  He was still in love with his dead wife.

  She was still in love with Shane.

  She checked, making sure, but there he was, in her heart. Hers.

  And see, there was Brady right next to him.

  Her Brady. Tall, dark, hurt. Dangerous. Hers.

  Well, shit.

  Mackenzie stood up, stopping Ethan in the middle of a sentence. “Okay?”

  She smiled at him. “Just one of the joys of pregnancy. Cassandra will come with me.”

  Ethan watched them walk around the corner, his eyes following Mackenzie, worry in them.

  Mackenzie steered Cassandra inside the bathroom, heading for a stall as soon as they entered, and Cassandra said, “Oh, I thought you were trying to get me alone.”

  “I was. But I really do have to go.” She flipped the lock and said loudly, “So, what was that?”

  “I just. . .remembered I forgot to do something at work. Hopefully, I’ll get fired tomorrow morning.”

  “Hmm. You looked like you needed a bucket of ice cream to cry in.”

  “Please. I remember you bawling into your pathetic pint of ice cream when you realized you’d given your heart away.”

  “It was traumatic. Ethan O’Connor? Roughly three billion men in the world, and I go and fall for Ethan O’Connor. I’m still embarrassed about it.”

  Cassandra smiled. “Does he believe anything you say?”

  “No. Kind of like I don’t believe you were thinking about work a few minutes ago. I know you.”

  “Well, I wasn’t thinking about falling for someone who would embarrass me. I’m not sure I could be embarrassed. . . Okay, if I accidentally fell in love with Christian, I’d have to go hide my face in a pint of ice cream. I get that now.”

  Mackenzie came out of the stall to wash her hands, and she wasn’t smiling.

  And she didn’t say anything.

  She waited. Watched Cassandra in the mirror. And didn’t say anything.

  Cassandra sighed. “Mackenzie, I’ve already fallen in love, and it wasn’t a pint of ice cream I hid in, it was a keg of beer.”

  “Before my time.”

  “Well, it was in high school. We didn’t start with the beer floats until college.”

  Mackenzie stopped drying her hands. “I thought the nausea was over but that. . .” She shook her head. Cleared her throat. “You won’t distract me.”